Idaho Vandals Jokes!, Go Louisiana Tech Bulldogs!
Q: What do you call a Idaho player with a championship ring?
A: A thief!
Q: What should you do if you find three University of Idaho fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.
Q. What did the Idaho graduate say to the Louisiana Tech graduate?
A. "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order, please?"
Q: How do you get an University of Idaho grad off of your front porch?
A: Pay him for the pizza.
Q: Do you know why the University of Idaho football team should change its name to the "Opossums"?
A: Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.
Q: What's the only sign of intelligent life in Moscow?
A: Ruston: 187 Miles
Q: How do you make University of Idaho cookies?
A: Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours.
One day in an elementary school in Moscow, ID, a teacher asks her class if the Idaho Vandals are their favorite football team. The whole class says yes, except for Little Jimmy.
The teacher asks, "What's your favorite football team Jimmy?"
Little Jimmy says, "The Louisiana Tech Bulldogs "
The teacher asks, "Well, why is that?"
Little Jimmy says, "Well, my dad is a Bulldog fan, my mom is a Bulldog fan, I guess that makes me a Bulldog fan."
The teacher angered by his reply says, "If your dad was a moron and your mom was an idiot what would that make you?"
Little Jimmy says, "Well, I guess that would make me an Idaho fan."
Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the University of Idaho library?
A: Forty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.
Moscow News Report: Football practice in Moscow was delayed on Monday for nearly two hours. One of the offensive players, while on his way to the locker room, happened to look down and notice a suspicious looking, unknown, white powdery substance on the practice field. The head coach, Dennis Erickson, immediately suspended practice while the FBI was called in to investigate. After a complete field analysis, the FBI determined that the white substance unknown to the players was the goal line. Practice was resumed when the FBI decided that the team would not be likely to encounter the substance again.
Four college alumni were climbing a mountain one day: an Idaho, a Louisiana Tech grad, a Florida grad, and a Notre Dame grad. Each proclaimed to be the most loyal of all fans at their alma mater.
As they climbed higher, they argued as to which one of them was the most loyal of all. They argued all the way up the mountain, and when they reached the top, the Notre Dame grad hurled himself off the mountain, shouting "This is for the Fighting Irish!" as he fell to his doom.
Not wanting to be out done, the Florida grad threw himself off the mountain proclaiming, "This is for the Gators!"
Seeing this, the Louisiana Tech grad walked over and shouted "This is for the Bulldogs!" and pushed the Vandals fan off the side of the mountain.
Q: What do Idaho and pot have in common?
A: They both get smoked in bowls!
Q: Did you hear the story about the semi-truck carrying pigs that flipped over on the University of Idaho campus?
A: The officials had to check ID's before letting any of the Vandals cheerleaders back on board.
Q: How many University of Idaho freshman does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, it's a sophomore course.
Q: What does the average University of Idaho student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.
Q: Where was O.J. hiding right before the famous white Bronco chase?
A: On the University of Idaho campus. That's the last place you would find a football player.
Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of Idaho campus?
A: A visitor.
Q: What do you get when you breed a groundhog and the Idaho Vandals?
A: Six more weeks of bad football.
An Idaho Vandals fan walks into a doctor's office and removes his hat to reveal a frog sitting on his head. The doctor asks, "How can I help you?" The frog replies, "I was wondering if you could help me get this wart off my butt."
It was reported that Idaho head football coach Dennis Erickson will only be dressing twenty players for the Louisiana Tech game. The rest of the players will have to get dressed by themselves.
One foggy night, a Louisiana Tech fan and an Idaho fan were driving the opposite directions on a road near Ruston. While crossing a narrow bridge, they hit each other head-on, mangling both cars.
The Idaho fan manages to climb out of his car and survey the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says, "Man, I'm lucky to be alive!"
Likewise, the Bulldog fan gets out of his car uninjured, he too feeling fortunate to have survived.
The Idaho fan walks over to the Bulldog fan and says, "Hey, man, I think this is a sign that we should put away our petty differences and live as friends instead of being rivals."
The Bulldog fan thinks for a moment and says, "You know, you're absolutely right! We should be friends. In fact, I'm going to see if something else survived the wreck."
The Bulldog fan then pops open his trunk and removes a full, undamaged bottle of Jack Daniel's. He says to the Vandal fan, "I think this is another sign - we should toast to our newfound friendship." The Vandal fan agrees and grabs the bottle. After sucking down half of the bottle, the Vandal fan hands it back to the Bulldog fan and says, "Your turn!"
The Bulldog fan calmly twists the cap back on the bottle, throws the rest of the bottle over the bridge into the river and says, "Nah, I think I'll just wait for the cops to show up."
Two University of Idaho fans were walking down the street when they came upon a dog lying on the sidewalk licking and cleaning his groin like dogs do.
The first Idaho fan says to the second, "Boy, I wish I could do that."
The second Idaho fan replies, "Yeah, me too. But I wouldn't try it."
The first Idaho fan asks, "Why not?"
The second Idaho fan replies, "Because I'm afraid the dog might bite me."
A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a good Idaho joke?"
The guy next to him replies, "Well before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs., and I am an Idaho grad. The guy sitting next to me is 6' 2" tall, weighs 225, and he's an Idaho grad. And the fella next to him is 6' 5" tall, weighs 250, and he's an Idaho grad. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?"
The first guy says, "No, not if I'm gonna have to explain it three times."
Did you hear about the Vandal fan who was so upset that the Bulldogs beat Idaho that he tried to commit suicide by jumping out of his basement window?
General Schwarzkopf was walking through the desert during the Gulf War when he found a lamp on the ground. He picked it up, rubbed, and out came a genie.
The genie said to the General, "I will grant you one wish."
The General replied, "I wish that we will win this war. Here is a map of the desert and all the war parties. Please make us win the war."
The genie responded, "I'm not that powerful of a genie. I cannot grant you that wish."
"Well," the General responds, "then can you have Idaho win a bowl game this year?"
The genie thinks for a moment, then says, "Let me see that map again."
Q: How many Idaho fans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One, but he gets 3 credits.
My two favorite teams are Louisiana Tech and whoever plays Idaho!
Q: Why do University of Idaho fans keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
Q: What's the hardest thing about being an Idaho Vandal fan?
A: Telling your parents that you're gay.
Q: Did you hear about the fire in University of Idaho's football dorm that destroyed 20 books?
A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.
Q: Did you hear about the University of Idaho fan who locked his keys in his car?
A: He couldn't get his family out.
Q: Why do they throw out a sack of manure at University of Idaho weddings?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.
Q: What's the difference between an Idaho fan and a carp?
A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
Q: What do you get when you cross an University of Idaho fan and a pig?
A: Nothing. There's some things that a pig will not do.
It's
12:18 and Idaho STILL sucks!
Q: Why don't Idaho Vandals fans let their kids play in sand boxes?
A: Because cats keep covering them up.